He has contributed to Vanity Fair, Playbill, Details, Out Magazine, Time Out New York, and has appeared on Biography Channel, East Village Radio and in Wallpaper magazine.Follow him on Twitter and Instagram @benjaminsolomon.Marriage matchmaking has always been an important cultural practice in China.For generations, marriage was arranged by parents who followed the principle of “matching doors and windows,” which meant that people needed to marry those of similar social and economic standing.And the effects of it can be seen in much of modern culture, especially technology, with apps like Tinder and Ok Cupid like a real-world versions of Benjamin Solomon is a freelance writer based in New York City.He was most recently the Editor-in-Chief of Next Magazine.But over the past 30 years, these customs have been upended.I’ve studied how traditional Chinese marriage rituals have evolved in response to globalization.
The clever set ups — blind dates in bedrooms, blind dates in vans, blind dates with parents — kept generations of teens glued to the channel, much in the same way music videos had the decade prior.
But China’s 1978 “Open Door Policy,” which transitioned the country from a rigid, centrally planned economy to a global, market-based economy, exposed the Chinese people to an array of outside cultural influences.
Meanwhile, the country’s 1980 marriage law codified, for the first time, freedom to marry and gender equality.
But there are things you can do to make it easier -- for both of you. Also, think twice before texting or emailing her after the date, tempting as it may be. Worst case, if you can’t see her face to face, just call.
“That way you’re letting her know how you feel and also considering her,” says Geraldine K. If she doesn’t like your suggestion, throw out a different one. “Use basic manners: If it’s cold out, give her your jacket.” If you're feeling nervous, don't sweat it. But be careful not to put too much pressure on her or the relationship. “On these romantic comedies, love is all about infatuation and feelings,” Kalish says. It’s about caring and growing.” You need to give her and yourself room to grow as individuals, Piorkowski says. Spend time with her, but also spend time with your guy friends. “They tend to lash out.” It’s OK to go home and cry. (Kalish says her research shows that 90% of the time, the parents cause the breakup.) Besides, if you really like her, you don’t want to ruin the chances that you might get back together someday.